The transition to assisted living can be a challenge for many people, even after they have decided the change is the best choice. Coping with the emotion during the transition can be difficult, so be sure your loved one has friends, family and networks that can offer support, help them find answers to questions about assisted living or provide a reliable listening ear for their concerns.
Just like having conversations with aging family members about their future, maintaining an empathetic mindset and having an open and honest dialogue is helpful when your loved one is getting ready to make the transition to assisted living. By focusing on three key areas — preparation, emotional support and consistent communication — you can take concrete steps to lessen the stress and make the move smoother.
Preparing for the Move
From the time the topic is first discussed until your loved one is fully settled in their new space, preparation is an ongoing necessity.
Cooperative Decision-Making
The decision about how to transition your elderly parent or loved one to assisted living is not one that should be made lightly, and it also isn’t one that should be made without their input. An open and honest discussion is not only the right thing to do, it gives them time to start processing such a significant change after the decision to move has been made. These conversations are also an opportunity to explain the many benefits of assisted living, including:
- Professional and personalized care
- Better quality of life
- Maintaining independence
Laying out and exploring the positives can create a positive emotional response, even when the prospect of moving is difficult, ultimately making the decision for assisted living easier.
Find the Right Community
Plan tours and visits to the assisted living communities that your loved one is interested in so they have the opportunity to find the best fit. When you visit, make a point to meet staff and residents. This will ensure your loved one has the ability to build familiarity and comfort with their new home and community.
Personalize the New Space
Making a new place feel like home prepares your loved one for a settled life after the move. Bringing familiar keepsakes, photos and even furniture to their new assisted living community can make the transition easier and make a new space feel like home.
Coping With Emotions During the Transition
Heightened responses are understandable during the shift to an assisted living community, so it is important that you are prepared to help your loved one process the emotions that they are feeling.
First, validate the feelings they are having. Many people feel a sense of anxiety, uncertainty and loss during this time — especially if they are leaving a home they have lived in for many years. Take time to validate these feelings by actively listening to their concerns, acknowledging all of their emotions, positive and negative, and encouraging open communication throughout the process. Doing so without interrupting or judgement will go a long way towards allowing your loved one to work through their feelings in a comforting and understanding environment. Throughout the process, emphasize that even though they are moving, they aren’t alone in this transition.
Second, encouraging your loved one to cultivate a positive mindset during the transition process can go a long way in reducing anxiety — and can help frame the move in a positive light. Go over the new opportunities that will be available to your loved one, such as the potential for a close-knit community that lives near each other, planned events that the assisted living facilitates and how the ability to live each day as they choose with the support they need can give them the time to participate in a wide variety of activities. If possible, participate in events or activities the assisted living community is putting on to give your loved one an idea of what they could be joining.
Finally, don’t forget that you and your other family members will need emotional support through this process. It is perfectly natural to experience sadness, guilt, a sense of loss or any range of other difficult-to-process emotions. Finding a counselor or therapist to work with — or a support group, friends or family that have similar experiences — can help you stay emotionally healthy throughout your loved one’s move to an assisted living community.
Ensuring a Smooth Transition
It’s natural for moving to feel like a whirlwind, but stay supportive and available throughout the process. Once all the boxes have been unpacked and your loved one is moved in, keep in mind that this lull right after all the activity can be a difficult time. Being available for conversations and visiting frequently in the first few weeks is crucial for the initial phase of the transition — use this time to encourage your loved one to establish a routine, meet new people and find the positive aspects in the changes.
The early transition period is also a good time to make sure any concerns aren’t just being shared with you, but with the staff as well. This establishes open and healthy lines of communication between your loved one and the staff, in addition to ensuring they get the care and support they need. It takes time to acclimate to a new environment, so emphasize patience and the celebration of the small milestones along the journey of this transition.
Long-Term Adjustment and Well-Being
Assisted living is a huge change for many, but that doesn’t mean independence has to be lost in the transition. Encourage your loved one to make the decisions when it comes to activities and daily routines, while also supporting new interests or activities that they decide to try or find an interest in.
As your loved one settles into their new home, schedule visits, whether in-person or virtual, from friends and family to strengthen and deepen those connections. Explore activities and events that you and others can join that will strengthen the bond between you and your loved one’s new community and home.
To learn more about welcoming assisted living communities, check out the options from VOANS today. Our community managers are happy to help schedule a tour or answer any questions you may have.
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